The Three Things We Need Most

January 12, 2003

The Rev. Dr. Anthony J. Godlefski, Pastor

Montgomery United Methodist Church

Genesis 1:1-5 

Acts 19: 1-7 

Mark 1: 4-11

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ, good morning! I went to a lecture a couple of years ago by a psychologist who was speaking to a group of ministers. It was wonderful! He was talking about the topic of the three things we need most, and he shared some ideas that have stayed with me ever since. I’d like to share them with you today.

For your thinking this week – what do we need most in our hearts? Oh, after the need for food and clothing and safety and shelter are taken care of, what is it that we most deeply need?

Well, you might say that we need to be loved, and you’d be absolutely right. How do we need to be loved? I’d suggest to you this acronym: ARC. We need to be accepted, reflected, and connected.

Each and every one of us has a heart-hunger to be accepted just as we are. Did you ever watch a little child dance? When my niece, Susan, was a little girl, we’d put music on the stereo. Susan was an automatic ballerina – no lessons, but she would just get up and dance to the music. It was so beautiful. Have you seen a child do that? It’s a wonderful thing. It’s a celebration of the exuberance of life. Oh, when do we lose that? When do we become afraid to move and dance and be expressive? When do we become afraid to sing? When do we become afraid? The child knows what to do when the music starts.

The other thing that happens when the child dances, my friend, is the child needs to be accepted, appreciated, affirmed, needs to know that he or she is loved. It’s the first of the deep heart-hungers – the need to be accepted.

You hear stories of little children in nurseries who don’t know their own names, and maybe their lives seem fragile, but they’re given a lot of tender loving care, and their bodies begin to thrive. That’s what being accepted is about. It’s something we all need deeply.

And the second thing we need is to be reflected. It is human nature to be around people who are like us. And we need that. Why? Because we want to be understood. We want to be reflected because we want to be understood.

And the third thing that we need is to be connected. We all need the feeling that we are connected with somebody stronger than we are. We all need the feeling that we’re connected with somebody dependable, somebody we can count on to help us out when we’re down, somebody we can call up at three in the morning if we need to and it would be all right. Fortunate is the person who has somebody like that. We need to be connected. Those are the three deepest heart-hungers that we have.

I’m hear to tell you today that this beautiful Gospel story that we have here before us this morning tells us that each and every one of us is loved by Jesus Christ. Could you imagine Jesus standing on the hill overlooking the Jordan River? John is there, baptizing people, and Jesus loves each one. The people are crying. They are coming to John and saying, “Baptize me. Let me feel washed and cleansed and acceptable to God.” And Jesus is saying from His heart, “I accept you.” There is acceptance.

And then Jesus says to Himself, “You know what? I’m going to get myself baptized.” He goes down to the river, and John says, “This is the One. This is the Lamb of God. You don’t need to be baptized. I need to be baptized by you.”

And Jesus says, “Let it be so for now.”

Why? Why did He do it? Because He wanted to be just like us! Jesus knows you, inside and out. He knows me inside and out. He loves us still, and He loves us completely. That’s being reflected. That’s a beautiful thing. And that’s the joy of being a Christian, to know you have a savior like this, who has borne all our griefs, who knows what it means to weep and be broken-hearted, and loves us still. We are reflected by Jesus Christ.

And connected! Oh, my friends, how we are connected to God by Jesus! On Calvary’s hill, where He suffered and died, what did He say in that moment? He said, “I love you so much, I would do anything for you.” There’s a wonderful contemporary Christian song that says,

God loves people more than anything.
God loves people more than anything.
More than anything, He wants them to know
He’d rather die than let them go.
God loves people more than anything.

Our Savior came to make sure we know that we are connected to God with an unbreakable connection, and that is the sign of baptism.

But you know what? It doesn’t end there. When we know deep in our souls that we are loved by God, accepted, reflected, and connected, that’s just the start, because – hear the good news! – God has something for you to do. He has something that He wants you to do in response to that love, that He wants me to do in response to that love. He wants us to be reflections of Him.

So what do we do? What is our job? Our job is to go out into the world and let people know that they are accepted. Let people know that they have a chance with us and, most of all, with God. That’s our job. It’s a wonderful job! Our job is to go out into the world and let people feel reflected, listened to, given soft eyes like you’re giving me now. Let people feel reflected.

An interesting thing happened at a rehearsal of my Starlite Chorale. One fine Tuesday evening, about a year and a half ago, one of the lovely singers in the group, a physician, came into the group, and there was something different about her that day. Her lovely hair was gone, literally gone. We looked at her and said, “Susan, are you okay? Is everything all right?”

She said, “Yes, I’m in fine health. You’re wondering about the hairdo?”

“Yeah.”

Her sister was having chemotherapy and had lost her hair. And so that her sister would not feel so alone, Susan decided to have her hair shaved off. I wonder how the sister felt, with that incredibly generous, vulnerable gesture. How understood, how reflected, how not-so-alone she must have felt! What a gift to give! I can tell you that now, a year and a half later, both Susan and her sister are doing very well. But what an illustration of reflecting people.

You can do it and I can do it, without the haircut, by taking the time to listen, by taking the time to understand, by taking the time to reflect what another person is feeling.

And connected? Oh, my dear friend, what a wonderful job we have to do of inviting people to the house of the Lord, of letting people know that everyone is welcome in God’s house! I heard a story yesterday about a hairdresser. A woman in the congregation asked her hairdresser if she had a church home. The hairdresser said no. And the woman said, “Why don’t you come to my church? Give it a try.” And the hairdresser said yes. She came – and she stayed. And she told other customers of hers, “I have this wonderful church. Do you have a church home?” And now they are coming, and feeling connected to God.

That’s our job. It’s a wonderful job. It’s a wonderful opportunity. And so, my dear friends, as we affirm our baptism this morning, my prayer for you is that you would know that you are deeply accepted, reflected by the life of Jesus Christ, and unbreakably connected to God. And you are commissioned as His ambassadors to go out into the world and do the same for others, because God loves you. I do, too. God bless you, everyone. Amen.